Fun Vampires Have, Page 5

Do vampires have fun? Yeah, despite all the problems we have, we still manage to have some fun. We have more fun than blondes. Here’s some of the fun we have, some of the silly situations we sometimes find ourselves in… I’ve nicknamed this section “Freaking the Mundanes” (with a nod to Leslie Fish, who wrote a filk song of the same name about the SCA).

Seeking contributions and input. All submissions become the property of Sanguinarius: The Vampire Support Page, and will be considered for inclusion herein. Submissions may be edited. If you have an experience that you would like to share, send it to me, but let me know that it’s for Fun Vampires Have, and that it is OK to include what you wrote.


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Still being in High School does have its pros when you enjoy freaking people out. When Halloween rolls around, we’re allowed to wear our costumes during “Spirit Week”. Last year, I decided to strap up my corset top, put on some tight black jeans, and use my fangs that I had previously purchased from Hot Topic (love that store…good fangs, too). I’m already deathly pale and my body looks like a veiny map! People think I’m weird anyway, always reading vampire books or morbid-type books, and drawing demon things.

An underclassman (a freshman, I think) decided to stroll up and stand beside me, apparently trying to impress his friends. He looked at me, smiled, and said, “Hey…cutey…you real? Wanna treat?” He tilted his head back slightly to expose his neck, his friends laughing it up the entire time. My fangs look real, mind you, so when I smiled widely at him and leaned forward to breathe on his neck, he went stark pale and shivered. I replied softly, “Hmm…I would, but you know…morons aren’t my crimson delight.” He stepped away, eyes wide, and then walked away quickly. For the rest of the day, my friends were laughing and applauding my performance.

Contributed by Cheshire

I’m in an Auto Mechanics class in my school. My friends in the class know I’m a vampire, but had never seen me drink blood before. I accidentally cut my arm on a truck we were working on. My arm was dripping on the floor and they were staring at it with these looks of horror. So, just to freak them out (and because the sight of the blood was making me thirsty), I brought my arm to my mouth and licked the blood away. Lyndsey, one of the girls, passed out at the sight. The others just backed away. I walked away, laughing. The cut needed stitches, and Lyndsey won’t even look me in the eyes since then. She edges away whenever I look at her. I find it quite hilarious, myself.

Contributed by Anonymous

I am a college student in Canada and am also a sang. Last semester, I was best friends with the hottest guy in my class (the other girls made the votes), who also happened to be married. Now, we were just good friends, but that didn’t stop one girl from getting on my nerves. Upon seeing me and my friend together, she started telling the class that we were having an affair, obviously out of jealousy. My friend and I found this hilarious. So, one day, we sat outside, waiting for her to show up (he knows I’m a vamp and we both decided to stage this to scare her). She came outside shortly after and, with a flash of fangs (real fangs of course), I flashed a whiplash smile at the jealous girl and moved my lips to my friend’s neck, making it look like I was biting him. Her eyes widened in a gut-busting look of disbelief and she managed to fall on her ass as she tried to turn and run back inside! LMAO.

Of course, word got around my fishbowl class about what happened, but all my friend and I had to do was deny it happened and nobody believed the jealous girl. The moral of the story is, no matter how jealous people get of you, all you need to do is scare the shit out of them so they make themselves look worse.

Contributed by Dark Princess

Most of my friends don’t know I’m a vampire, so when I do vampire-type things, it freaks them out sometimes.

One day I was at a “gathering” with my friends (basically where we all meet in one place, and act like idiots) and we were in the middle of town, with lots of people around.

Three friends arrived late. One of them is called Hamish (which is also my name), so he said, “Hamish!” and I said, “Hamish”, then I started biting him fairly hard on the neck. I got a lot of strange looks from my friends, and from strangers, who just happened to be in the area.

After I stopped biting him, my friends thought nothing of it, and everything continued as “normal”.

I kept biting my friends on the neck all day. In fact, they became so used to it, that they all began doing it as well. So, at school, we always get called “Vampire”, “Goth” or “Satanist”. So, usually, I just grin at them and say, “Yep”.

Contributed by Ham

When I was in middle school, there was an annoying boy in my classes. He liked nothing more than to annoy people. He was a pervert and tried to flirt with all of the girls, including me.

During Latin class one day, he sat close to me, too close. I was reading a book, and my bookmark was on the table. He snatched the bookmark, and I simply asked him to give it back. I certainly didn’t want him to dirty it with his grimy hands. He wouldn’t give it back, so I just ignored him.

But that didn’t satisfy him; he continued to annoy me. How? I don’t exactly remember; I think he was just saying things that I didn’t want to hear. The reason why I don’t remember is because something wild and uncontrollable stirred within me, and next thing I knew, I jerked my head to the side to face him and gave him my best glare. (I should mention that I’m usually a nice person, so it’s very unusual for me to glare at people, but I do have a bad temper.) I was only planning on giving him a cold look, but at that moment, my anger built up and came out in a low, mean growl. I think I even bared my teeth. It was all practically a reflex that came naturally to me.

I don’t remember the expression on his face because I was completely blinded by anger. I do recall feeling his fear (if that even makes sense, I’m not psy by the way). My eyes shifted to his hand as he quickly dropped the bookmark on the table. He then jumped off the chair and literally ran to the back of the class. Interestingly enough, no one seemed to notice. Needless to say, he avoided me from then on.

I have strong, long nails, and they’re quite dangerous too. In fact, I’ve accidentally scratched myself before, and the cut was very deep. Well, one night, I was vamping out, and I could not obtain blood, so I entertained myself by painting my nails blood red. The next day at school, a boy in my science class noticed my long, red nails. “Do you use your nails to cut people’s flesh?” he asked me as he made a gesture with his hands as though he were about to cut his arm with his nails. At first, I gave him an odd look, but then I decided to just follow along, and responded, “Yes…” He then said, “And you then eat the people because you’re a cannibal?” I was about to tell him that he’s lost his mind, if he ever had one, but then the thought of blood caused me to become thirsty. I looked at his arm, where he had made the gesture, and a thought occurred to me. Is drinking a person’s blood considered cannibalism? Just to continue with our little game, I smiled and replied, “Yes.” I must have given him an odd look because his eyes opened wide and he looked down at his arm and remained quiet.

Contributed by Yeli

My friend, Morgan, and I went to a Chinese restaurant one Sunday. We dressed very vampirically, but still looked nice for the occasion. Morgan sported a pair of vampire fangs that I didn’t notice till we got in the car. Well, once we got there, we were minding our own business and this small group of church-goers sat down at the table next to us. My friend and I were still minding our own business, and he cracked a joke about something. I forget what it was about, but he was grinning and showing his fangs, as well. One of the Church-goers saw his fangs and panicked; her husband looked over and just shook his head, but then the entire group got up and moved all the way across the restaurant to get away from us. Morgan and I were trying so hard not to laugh! We both are vampires, and fangs are quite effective if you want people to leave you alone. 😀

from Andrew
aberry2002 @

I had made myself a long black cloak so that I could dress like Roxula (Richard Roxburgh as Dracula) and I even used make-up to make my skin pale (I have no trouble with sunlight so long as I have a cup of coffee in the morning, and when I don’t only my eyes are affected). I had blood-red lipstick and red nails (which aren’t quite long yet, but they’re getting there), and my eyes were sticking out cause they were traced in black. Apart from the red, I really looked like a pretty corpse.

I was lolling around downtown, nothing to do, the next bus taking me home would have been around 8:45 pm and it was only a quarter to 7:00 pm. There is a church downtown, right across the street from King’s Place (which is where all the busses stop). I walked in, and there was some beautiful music playing. I went to where the ‘sanctuary level’ is, and walked in through the double doors. It was just a practice for a musical performance going on, but there were a fair amount of people gathered. A few turned to see who had come in, and they stared.

I walked right up to the altar, knelt on one knee, crossed myself (I’m neo-pagan, by the way) and casually sat in a seat right up front. When the song was over and people were getting ready to leave, I went right up to the performer and told her I liked her flute-playing. She tried to avoid me while saying thanks, and as I turned to leave back down the aisle, several people in their seats were crossing themselves.

Okay, maybe it’s not that funny, but I was bored and tired at the time so it had given me a laugh after I was safely out of the church.

Contributed by Christina
amalthea727 (at)

My story is, one day at school I had decided to bring my fake fangs that I had gotten for Halloween that previous year. At lunch, I was just hanging out with some of my friends. We have this weird wall outside that everyone goes behind. Well, I went behind it and, being as morbid and evil as I am (I mean this literally), I just kind of stood there behind the wall, glaring at the people that were above it and stuff. Well, someone I hated came above the wall and I hissed at them. They backed away instantly and everyone started asking me if my fangs were real. I just smirked and answered, “Yes…” People have kind of backed off from bothering me lately. Only a few of my friends know who and what I really am, and they accept it very well, which kind of amazed me.

Contributed by Wings of Blood

In study hall, in my high school, this guy always messes around with me while I’m on the computer. He came up to me one day (and mind you, I wanted blood badly), and started poking me in the cheek. He kept saying that I taste like steak, and stuff like that, so I turned to him and bit his wrist. Needless to say, he freaked out. He came back the next day, and asked if I could do it again.

Contributed by Rayne_Of_The_Night

[On to Page 6]

I’m the founder/creator/page slave of I’m in my early-to-mid 40s. I have 2 special kitties and a good man.

More info later.

See my website, Sangi’s Corner, for more about me.

Sanguinarius E. Sanguinarius – who has written posts on for Real Vampires.

About Sanguinarius E. Sanguinarius

I’m the founder/creator/page slave of I’m in my early-to-mid 40s. I have 2 special kitties and a good man. More info later. See my website, Sangi’s Corner, for more about me.
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