Fun Vampires Have, Page 1

Do vampires have fun? Yeah, despite all the problems we have, we still manage to have some fun. We have more fun than blondes. Here’s some of the fun we have, some of the silly situations we sometimes find ourselves in… I’ve nicknamed this section “Freaking the Mundanes” (with a nod to Leslie Fish, who wrote a filk song of the same name about the SCA).

Seeking contributions and input. All submissions become the property of Sanguinarius: The Vampire Support Page, and will be considered for inclusion herein. Submissions may be edited. If you have an experience that you would like to share, send it to me, but let me know that it’s for Fun Vampires Have, and that it is OK to include what you wrote.


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Things that make my little vampy heart sing:

  1. Having a fellow vamp as a boyfriend. He understands me so well, and even though he lives far away at the moment, he astral projects in his dreams sometimes. The first time I got so freaked out. I was sitting in bed, telling myself I had to sleep for school in the morning. Then I felt this “presence” on the bed to my right. I looked over and about a foot from my face there was this spot where my eyes kept wanting to focus but they wouldn’t because there was nothing there, but I put out my hand and it tingled when it touched that spot. We talked the next day and I told him about it and he told me about dreaming he went into a room and lay down beside me in a bed. Trippy, no?
  2. Precognitive dreams. I don’t know if this is a vamp thing or if it’s just stronger because I am, but I have déjà vu every single day, and it is tres cool because I know when something important is going down.
  3. Taking long walks and runs at midnight and feeling the air around me, and feeling so…. alive!
  4. People who eat sixteen Pixy Stix for lunch and then sit next to me in class.. *toothy grin* Mmm.. hyperness.
  5. Being a total lover of all things Vampiric in media and then having my awakening and thinking, “Ok.. I don’t get cool powers, I get a lot of disadvantages, and a truckload of differences… but did you say I get to be a vampire?… SWEET!!!”
  6. Yoga classes in dark, cool rooms with incense and candles… Ahh.. Feel the meditation-y-ness.
  7. Playing online D&D at three in the morning and being the only person awake enough to actually play with any quality at all. 😛
  8. Being called “the normal one” at school. If only they knew… *another toothy grin*
  9. Hearing! Better hearing! Gawd, I love being able to tell what folks are whispering about. 😛
  10. This feeling of all being right with the world that I get when walking about in the middle of the night, well-fed and happy, having just seen my sweetie and knowing that what I am is good and right and there is a reason for me to be what I am… and to be proud of it.

Contributed by Ki Brightmoon; contact at Kiarabus (at)

Here is a little joke I pulled on a friend of mine.

I had gone out with a few friends to a local Goth club in San Francisco. I was tired when I got there from not getting any sleep for nearly two days. (Needless to say, staying up cleaning for nearly 48 hours was a BAD idea!) My best friend, Cal, was joking around with this very nicely painted-up girl at the club. He asked her if she was a real vampire, him not knowing I was. I sat there, listening to my best friend make a complete boob of himself to this girl. The really funny part was she was leading him on, saying she was a vampire. (wrinkles nose and arches a brow Ummmmmm….no.) Like I said, I had been tired, so I was slightly on the grouchy side. Listening to my friend was starting to get on my nerves. The other reason I was slightly grouchy, besides being tired, was the fact that I had gone and had my teeth done. I had new caps put on my canines. I had true fangs again. (Long story short, I had fangs as a child but mum made me have them filed down!) So…I was tired, sore from having my teeth done as well as feeling a bit peckish. wicked grin

I turned to my friend, whom had not seen the teeth yet and smiled at the girl next to him, leaning over him so he would not see the fangs. I grinned wickedly at her and purred, “Ahhhhh…well merry met, sister…” The girl turned so pale, that her pale makeup seemed dark on her skin! LMAO She stuttered to excuse herself and left. Cal was wondering why she took off until I grinned at him and HE freaked! He yelped and jumped in his seat, making me bust up laughing. He got mad at me, but has since forgiven me. Hell, he even laughs about it now. He warns me now, when we go to the Goth club, NO SMILING WICKEDLY AT THE GIRLS! giggles

Contributed by Wendy A.K.A. Absynthe Night

I’m on the Jehovah’s Witness’s blackballed list here in town for what happened when I was younger. I found out through a friend who was dating one of them. They still tell horror stories eight years later about what happened.

I’m a Domme, and once in the middle of a session, there was a knock on the door. I went to answer it, leaving a “pet” of mine strapped down 4-pointed to my living room floor, looking the worse for the wear, and naked. He was still there when I invited the two young men in to talk about their god to me. They stepped over him on their way to the couch — <My home was like a dark little cold cave> — and they then flipped on the lamp, while I was making coffee in the kitchen. I rushed out to their screams and trying to run out the door! LOL They were pummeling each other trying to make it through the door. Noticeably, they never bothered me there at that address again..

Contributed by The Giggling Gwyn

A group of us met at Denny’s (no comments from the Peanut Gallery — it’s a great place to meet), and we were gathered at our table minding our own business, when a group of teeny-bopper mundanes (whom I presume had come to Denny’s after some High School football game) came in and sat down at a nearby table. Since they dress so weird and seldom see very many normal dressers out and about (arch look I said, NO comments from the Peanut Gallery!), we were fodder for their conversation and stares. This is always fun since it gives us the opportunity to talk about how bizarre they are within their earshot, and stare back with various looks ranging from scornful, to sweetly evil, to outrageously vampy. It’s so strange…they can dish it out, but they aren’t used to taking it at all. I do think we spooked the poor things… awww… wicked giggle They needed their horizons broadened, anyway.

Contributed by Sanguinarius

I commute to and from work on the train. I eventually noticed that there was a guy staring at me constantly. I did not know him…but he did not let that stop him. Each day he would work his way closer and closer to me…occasionally getting off at my stop and following me to my car…but never saying anything. I finally had enough! I have a beautiful set of fangs…so I waited for this jerk to get close enough to see my mouth clearly, and I flashed him my most dazzling smile. His face froze into the most hilarious expression of disbelief…so I checked around quickly to make sure no one else was looking, and I snarled at him. He turned about 6 different shades of white and almost ran from the car.

Never saw him again! A great set of fangs can be just as effective as a can of mace.

Contributed by Pale Lady

I was at the library the other day. I was outside, minding my own business, smoking a cigarette, and this lady came up to the door to go inside. Mind you, I was just standing there smoking. She looked at me and crossed herself. This tickled me. I just smiled to let her know that I’d seen her do it, put the ciggie out, and followed her inside. 🙂

Contributed by Sanguinarius

When I still lived in California, there were 2 Jehovah’s Witnesses that used to come knocking on the door. The funny thing is, they would come back occasionally, even though I had told them “Sorry, I’m not interested.” So one morning, when I saw them walking up the steps to my front door through the window, I quickly grabbed my fangs and my sunglasses, popped in the teeth, and casually opened the door as I always did. Once they said their thing (and yes, this time I let them finish their sentences…), I smiled pleasantly (making sure that my nice pointy teeth were showing) and once again stated that I wasn’t interested. I think it’s safe to say that they never came back to my door… grin

So next time they come knocking at your door, just do what I did! It works! 😉

Contributed by Lady Morgana, Morgana’s Lair

Once my eight year old sister’s friend, Danielle was over and I was in the bathroom primping for a night out. The little girl would NOT stop watching me, and I HATE when people watch me put on makeup! So… I decided to have a little fun. giggles mischievously I had not, and still have not, found a donor so I opened one of my self-inflicted wounds and began licking at the luscious red life force… RIGHT IN FRONT OF DANIELLE! It was very funny watching her stare at me. I looked back at her and said, “My blood’s no good. Can I try some of yours?” grins evilly I laughed as she turned white and ran out of the room. Now little Danielle knows to leave me alone when I’m putting on my makeup, and that you DO NOT annoy a 13-year old vampire. >:)

From Candi, a.k.a Darnkess_21

A while ago I was sitting outside around midnight watching guys deliver phone books. When one of the guys came to my house he stopped as if afraid. He obviously didn’t see me as I was in the shadows. As he started again towards my door I shifted into crouch position. I have pretty long and very sharp canines. As soon as he set the book on my welcome mat, I pounced and scared him half to death! He turned so white he almost glowed. As he ran away, I laughed and shouted, “Thanks, a lot, Mister!” Imagine the beauty of it all; A 20-year-old being scared of a 13-year-old!

From anonymous

I am a psy-vamp/energy vamp. I have learned to become more sensitive to life-energy and to more powerfully manipulate it through studies in Reiki, Chi Gung, and other alternative and martial arts.

I work, among other jobs, in a deli at a local supermarket. We are next to the seafood department, and when it’s slow we amuse ourselves in many sometimes childish ways. Anyway, one of my co-workers found out that if you take one finger and pat a lobster’s head the lobster loses consciousness. So after the manager had gone home for the night he started pulling lobsters out, patting them until they stopped moving and then balancing them on their heads so they do a headstand, and then bragging about “mesmerizing” them. I didn’t pay too much attention to him because I was checking out a couple of ladies in the store, so he threatened to do the same to me.

At that, I decided to have a little fun. I went over, grabbed a lobster out of the tank, and never patted it’s head, just held my hands about 3 inches away from it and sucked out most of its energy, making the lobster pass out. That really freaked out that kid and all the others that saw it. So I jokingly threatened to do the same to them if they didn’t get back to work. Of course, I returned the energy to the lobster, and even did a little energy healing on it before I put it back in the tank.

Contributed by R.I.P. Blacksmith

[On to Page 2]

I’m the founder/creator/page slave of I’m in my early-to-mid 40s. I have 2 special kitties and a good man.

More info later.

See my website, Sangi’s Corner, for more about me.

Sanguinarius E. Sanguinarius – who has written posts on for Real Vampires.

About Sanguinarius E. Sanguinarius

I’m the founder/creator/page slave of I’m in my early-to-mid 40s. I have 2 special kitties and a good man. More info later. See my website, Sangi’s Corner, for more about me.
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